This life of ours, it can be rough. I refuse to be molded by circumstance, I will forever stand my ground in the most vicious of storms. Each storm that I encounter will only make me stronger. Will only teach me a knew lesson. Each storm will leave me a better person, a better Mommy, wife, sister, daughter, granddaughter and friend.
I know he is in a better place. I remind myself that everyday. It doesn't stop me from missing him, it doesn't make the sadness disappear. The hardest part is watching my sweet Grandma suffer. She is lonely and a little lost. Not to mention she has had probably the worst year of her life. Aside from the total emptiness she feels by his absence things have just been difficult for her. First her lawn mower broke. Which sounds petty but when you are 76 years old and need to mow 2.5 acres it could be a little difficult having to push that darn thing around! THEN her air conditioner broke. When its 105 out its hard to just put it to the side. When they want like $8000 because they cant fix the old one it needs to be replaced. It might give you a little headache. Its just been one thing after another.
Some goodbyes are not as peaceful as others. Last week on April 13th one of my Best Friends moms passed away. This woman was like a second Mother to me. I practically lived with her during allot of my teenage years. She was such a genuine person and always made everyone feel so loved. Really Loved. She was diagnosed with lung cancer and colon cancer and was told it was inoperable. The mass was too close to her heart. Within 10 days it had spread to her heart and esophagus. She was told she had about a month to live. 3 days later she passed away. Everyone was in COMPLETE shock. Things like this really make you stop dead in your tracks. Literally stop. In 2008 she reconnected with her childhood sweetheart and remarried. She also met a sister she never knew she had. She was such a special person.